I have a car, a white Plymouth Breeze. She
accelerates with a stutter and her brakes are awfully sketchy, but I love her.
She resides in Minnesota.
I live in Texas.
That’s right, I am carless here at camp and
although I chose this, sometimes it feels really unfair and bothersome.
I get along alright as I live with the most
generous and wonderful people who offer me rides anywhere I go, but I usually
just tag along when I overhear a Wal-Mart run being planned.
Basically what this means is that I don’t
plan my own life half the time. I don’t make my own choices. I have ideas and
then hope someone else has them as well. But I’m really dependent on this
makeshift family I live with.
And sometimes I HATE it.
I’m a very independent and wannabe carefree
spirit. I don’t like being tethered to others’ plans.
I do what I want. (via Pinterest)
I’m being humbled, but I don’t like it at
all.
The Lord has really been showing me these
things- how it’s ok to need people, how I can’t do it all on my own, how I
should be less selfish.
It’s a lifelong lesson I’m sure as we have
always wanted to rebel against this idea of needing people, but this is how we
were made to live together and share together. To feel helpless once in a while
because we don’t have everything we need. When we start to think so, we start
to live our lives without the guidance of an even bigger community- the
Trinity.
So, this is one little way in which I am
learning to be humble, to trust others, and to rely on the Lord.
It’s not easy, but it is nice sometimes to
be the follower and let everyone else make all the decisions.
love this Ashlee. it is so hard to ask for help. or to come to terms with the fact that my actions affect others. I am not exempt from living in the community around me.
ReplyDeleteIt's such an American notion too- this do it all yourself attitude. I'm striving to be more a part of the community I am in instead of wishing for a more ideal one. The Lord put me here, the engaging part is my role. :) Love you!
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